Most People Plan the Move. Few Plan What Comes With It.
There are many reasons people move to France and later decide to return to the United States. Sometimes it’s because of things no one could have anticipated.
But in many cases, it’s not.
That’s what this page is about. The part people usually only talk about after they’ve been here a while.
I See the Same Story Over and Over
I read the stories and hear them in conversations. I’ve seen the same patterns play out quietly with different people in different situations.
The details change, but the arc usually doesn’t end the way people expect.
What Shows Up Again and Again
Income That Works — Until It Doesn’t
Most people do not move without a plan for money. Many plans, however, depend on everything continuing to go right. Remote work shifts. Contracts pause. Projects do not renew. The backup plan quietly becomes the main plan.
What often gets underestimated is friction. Time zone differences complicate schedules. Evenings turn into work hours. Clients need to be flexible, and not all of them are. Over time, small accommodations start to feel like strain on both sides.
This usually happens without recklessness. It happens because flexibility disappears faster than expected, and income that once felt stable becomes conditional.
Language Plans Built on Optimism
“I’ll learn once I’m there” is not naive. It is human. But learning a language while managing paperwork, housing, and daily life is slow and exhausting, especially under stress.
Language is not just a skill. It carries emotional weight, and that weight compounds when everything else feels unfamiliar.
Paid Help That Solves Tasks, Not Pressure
Relocation companies and assistants often do what they promise. Things get done. What they cannot remove is the emotional weight of the move. The follow-ups. The waiting. The sense that you are always one step behind.
Outsourcing logistics does not outsource stress.
Double Lives Cost Double
Keeping a U.S. house “just in case” feels responsible. Sometimes it is. But running two households, even temporarily, carries a weight people rarely account for. Maintenance, taxes, insurance, market risk, and the mental load of managing something an ocean away all add up faster than expected.
At the same time, you will spend money when you arrive in France. There is no way around it. You need furniture. You need appliances. You need things that make a place livable, not just legal. Even modest setups cost more than people plan for, and those costs arrive early.
None of this means you did anything wrong. It means you are living in two realities at once. And that split attention quietly drains both money and energy.
It is rarely one big expense that causes trouble. It is the steady pull of maintaining a life you left while trying to build one you have not fully settled into yet.
Time Is Always Underestimated
Tasks take longer. Processes stretch. Simple things turn into multi-day affairs. Not because France is broken, but because it moves differently.
People budget money. They rarely budget patience.
Isolation Sneaks Up Quietly
At first, the quiet feels peaceful. Over time, it feels thin. Fewer casual conversations. Fewer shared references. Fewer people who understand your old life without explanation.
When pressure hits, isolation does not cause the problem. It removes the buffer that would have helped absorb it.
The Emotional Weight No One Talks About
When things get hard, people do not just feel stressed. They feel embarrassed. Embarrassed that they wanted this. That they talked about it. That they believed it would work.
Leaving does not feel like a decision. It feels like a personal failure, even when it is not.
This isn’t about being tough. It’s about having enough breathing room for the dream to survive reality.
Every event we host is designed with intention, from the atmosphere we create to the way each session flows.
Why I’m Still Here
I don’t speak French well yet, and I run into the same walls everyone else does. Paperwork stalls. Conversations only half make sense. Simple tasks often take more effort than expected. None of that surprises me.
The difference is that I knew why I was coming before I arrived. Denise came for the dream, and I respect that dream. I share it. But I prepared myself for the reality that comes after the honeymoon wears off.
I did not expect this to be easy. I expected it to be worth it, even when it was inconvenient. That distinction matters more than language skills or perfect planning. When things get frustrating, the question is not “why is this so hard?” It is “why did I choose this in the first place?”
France does not reward enthusiasm. It rewards commitment. That is why I am still here.